Lord of Darkness

So I have a new crush which I'm not going to talk about though.
I woke up this morning in a emotional calm before the storm and then a couple of minutes ago the tidal wave hit and I haven't been able to do anything productive since then. Just waiting for the Real World to come on now.

Frat boys, friends and party

I just heard the worst fucking idea out of one of my suite mates 

Addiction

I have to addictions but truly neither of them are so terrible but they can be troublesome sometimes my first addiction is touch I have to touch people you not emotionally close to me unless you touch me and I've become so accustomed to touching people it's second nature to me at this point. My second addiction is to reading  this come vastly difficult when I run low on funds or new books to read. My first is has become so problematic now that I don't have people to touch on a regular basis and with that my mental state has begun to slowly decline and it makes it difficult for me to focus and task that require to much thought. I wouldn't have finished these last two post if I didn't have my Ipod blasting in my ears right now.

Relapse

I feel like the same damn kid that I was in high school alone and depressed ready for the end to come so very soon always so close to the edge of life and death that I really just wanted to jump. The same kid that couldn't wrap his head around the emotional warfare that high school is he took that emotional pain and turned into something physical by cutting himself something he could deal with. I feel like that kid again and I can't take living through that again there is no saving grace this time because this time when I reach the ledge I will not met it with hesitation but instead I will welcome it like and old friend and simply close my eyes and fall in to the dark abyss. There is so much I want to do with my life but I can't keep teetering on the ledge I just can't I barely made it through high school with my sanity intact but to try and relive it is far worse then going through it again. The horrors that I saw in this place sends chills down my spine at the thought and it is for this reason I will either do or die.

I May Be Bad But I'm Perfectly Good At It

So I've been given the silent treatment by a guy and all I want to know is if he was to work as a group for a class we have together and instead of answering me with a no he give me the fucking silent treatment I'm really trying to restrain my self but really you can you not just give me a straight fucking answer its a question not a brain teaser so just fucking answer the question. I'm really trying not to do the creepy thing and just text him about it because then I look like a crazy stalker kid and all I want is an answer. This is really aggravating shit in case you missed my annoyance at the situation.I just want to be _______ (insert title of post) and just explode.

Dating

So I'd really like to know what the hell is going on with my life do i have to be some scrawny little twig to find a relationship because if that what it take I might as well go jump from the clock tower now cause that ain't ever going to happen

First of Sept. 2011 3:41

So I'm seriously debating going home for the long weekend  but I don't wanna go home but I seriously need to get some of my clothes, my goggles, my workout shirts, and several other misc. items but i don't wanna me at home until Monday. But I don't wanna be in my room by myself all weekend.
On another note I shaved my face (I need a new razor) and now my face feels smooth I wonder how long that's going to last. I like it though I might have to start doing this more often.I need a cuddle buddy my at least for the weekend someone to watch movies with all weekend. I so love listening Glee the music namely The Warblers album. Love listening to Blaine(Darren Criss) sing.
I don't think I have anything else to say So peace much love and comment.